I glibly talk about having 30 years left in my life to do whatever it is I want to do...and lately I've been lamenting that I still don't know what that is.
First, the 30 year thing ~ 30 years ago feels like yesterday. Thirty years from now will be here in a heartbeat. In other words, there's no time to waste.
Second, thinking that I don't know what I want to be when I grow up is bullshit. It's just my ego trying to second guess my heart and soul, which know that I'm an artist. That's what I'm doing with the rest of my life, that's what I'm being now that I've grown up.
So I'm going for it. All those art/craft things I've wanted to do for eons (printmaking, bookmaking, mixed media et al) are going to get done. I'm in the process this week of completely reorganizing my mixed media studio (AKA the front room worktable where I've done wet work), I have a stack of new art books in my shopping cart at Amazon just waiting for me to purchase, I'm contacting local artists who's work I love re: taking classes with them, and nothing's going to stop me any more.
There is no time to waste. I don't want to spend the rest of my life second guessing myself, and then regretting that I didn't do more when I could. Which is now.
Wow, go, Connie. This is exciting, and your friend will be smiling up there!
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing like an encounter with death to make you realize that time is precious and that it should not be wasted. I'm sorry about your friend but I'm glad it is making you do the things you still want to do. You seize the moment and that is how it should be. Good for you.
ReplyDeleteI echo Irene's comments. I made a major change in my life after my brother died at 44, and it was the best thing I could have done. Times like this are our wake-up call, and it puts things in perspective, to help us decide what is really important. Hold on to that re-dedication to what is in your heart and soul, and it will help you realize your dreams.
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